TransformAble Coaching and Consulting
  • About
    • Client Testimonials
  • Services
    • Coaching
    • Consulting
    • Facilitation & Speaking >
      • Layers of Leadership
  • Blog
  • Connect
    • Positive Intelligence
  • Events
    • THRIVE Retreat

This "Wild & Precious Life"

Time Part II: Owning the Space In-Between

3/30/2024

10 Comments

 
Picture
"YOU are where time comes from -- you can make as much of it as you want!" 
—Gay Hendricks
After posting about time and abundance last month on Leap Day I have continued to get reminders about time and my relationship with it and I realized there is a Part II. 😀 I'm in San Diego for spring break. On a rainy Saturday (not typical here) we explored the San Diego Museum of Art. With every magnificent piece of art I found myself drawn to the description of the piece, specifically the artist, even more specifically the birth and death years. I couldn't stop calculating  ​how long each artist lived. For each artist's life I made a judgment, this life was too short, this life was really long (amazing how many artists I found who lived almost 100 years).

​And the thing is I don't know about the life in the time. The dash between birth and death year. This space in-between is where all of life happens. The numbers don't tell me about that, the numbers tell only the time in the life. I don't know about the joy, the pain, the ups and downs of these artists' lives. And I was reminded again that we are the ones who make the life in the time, we choose to make the time for what matters to us. We create the space in-between, we define the dash!
Then as I finished When the Heart Waits by Sue Monk Kidd I was reminded of time again. She explores the power of the waiting space and what caught my attention was the concept of Chronos and Kairos time. Chronos is chronological time, it’s sequential, it’s the ongoing estimating of what I can get done in a minute, 10 minutes, an hour, a day. It’s the time we live in when the second hand seems to pause before making it’s way around to another minute when I am waiting for a phone call or news from my kids, finishing a run that's a bit of a slog, or bored with whatever I am doing. It’s how the school year feels to my daughter and used to feel to me when I was a kid, it was interminable, summer would never come (and I liked school 😉).

​Kairos time is different. To quote Glennon Doyle “It’s time outside of time. It’s metaphysical time. It’s those magical moments in which time stands still.” Kairos time is playing Hygge with my family on the North Shore last summer - answering questions like "What is the best trait you inherited from your mother and what is the best one you inherited from your father?" - we spent at least an hour unpacking that one with all 6 of us. It’s watching my daughter score a goal at an 8:45 pm soccer scrimmage (that I almost decided not to go to, because I didn't have time) and cheering her on. When I’m in it I have no idea what time it actually is and yet I’m fully present with what is in that moment. It’s a place of peace and love. It’s the moments of aliveness, recognizing and feeling the utter joy of it.
 
A third reminder about time came from reading The Big Leap: Conquer Your Hidden Fear and Take Life to the Next Level by Gay Hendricks. He uses different words for Chronos and Kairos, he calls Chronos Newtonian time and Kairos Einstein time. I actually re-read the chapter on Einstein time because I’m so enmeshed in Chronos/Newtonian time that I found it hard to understand Kairos/Einstein time. And last week I received a cry for help from a loved one and it clicked. Kairos/Einstein time is the deep understanding that we are the source of time, and the magic moments are ours to make. In Kairos/Einstein time we drop everything and cancel meetings to be with our family and friends because that’s what matters. In Kairos/Einstein time we choose what is most important and we don’t worry about the minutes, hours, or even days instead we fully surrender to this moment and what it brings.

This is the shift for me, I am the source of time, you are the source of time, we own it. We make time for what matters to us. When time is about the numbers, we miss the aliveness in it. We get stuck in the running, in the calculating. We become victim to it, it's exhausting;  and this culture of busyness is draining my energy or at least limiting rather than expanding it. Living into whatever we are doing, at work, at home, alone or together is about love, laughter, connection, peace and purpose. It's the space in-between the beginning and the end. It's the courageous space of taking charge of time. The space of you, the space of inspiration, the space of energy. You are creating it right now. Tap into the wonder! You and your potential are waiting for you to take the reins and own what you are doing in your dash. Want some support in discovering and owning what matters to you? Let's connect.
10 Comments
Josie Lagerstrom
4/9/2024 10:37:42 pm

What's so hard is that you can't really know when you're in Kairos time until after it passes. Reflecting is the only way I've found I understand when I use my Kairos time. Fascinating distinction between Newton and Einstein!!

Reply
Caroline Cochran link
4/16/2024 05:25:44 pm

For me, Kairos time is a feeling more than a knowing. I know it when I feel it. And I sometimes don't pay enough attention to the feeling, I get so swept up in Chronos/Newtonian time with my to-do lists and busy calendar, I forget to pause. Thanks Josie for your comment, so good to explore this idea more together!

Reply
Kirsten Hollister
4/16/2024 03:03:30 pm

Beautiful!! The message (and the photo). Might there be a book or podcast in your future —if that’s something you choose to do with your time? I’d happily spend my time listening as this truly touched me and was a much needed message today.

Thank you for sharing.

Reply
Caroline Cochran link
4/16/2024 05:27:45 pm

Awwww, thank you Kirsten! There is a book in my future - I'm in the process of writing it this year. Thank you for the reminder that it matters. I'm so glad this post resonated with you - I appreciate you! 😘

Reply
Kristin Kolesar link
4/16/2024 03:13:53 pm

Great read Caroline! Always enjoy your insights.

Reply
Caroline Cochran link
4/16/2024 05:28:35 pm

Thanks Kristin - I appreciate your support. 😀

Reply
Nancy Scannell link
4/16/2024 05:14:24 pm

Thank you for the inspiration and stunning photo, Caroline! You exude joy in the moment! I love your insight into me being the source of my time, and you being the source of yours. I'm going to spend some time with this. :)

Reply
Caroline Cochran link
4/16/2024 05:31:29 pm

Thank you Nancy - your support for me is essential! It's so simple and yet not easy for me to own my time. I quickly get distracted with this and that. It's a practice to come back to presence and be with what is. I'm grateful that we can practice together! 🥰

Reply
Vicki Flaherty link
4/17/2024 09:43:38 am

You create the dash! Love that! Insightful and inspiring post, my friend.

Reply
Caroline Cochran link
5/7/2024 06:52:27 pm

Thank you Vicki! Not sure I coined that phrase, in fact pretty sure I didn't and that's okay. I don't own and I can live it. 😀

Reply



Leave a Reply.

    Author

    Caroline Cochran, PhD is a Certified Presence-Based® Coach and a Leadership Development Consultant with over 25 years of experience.

    View my profile on LinkedIn

    Categories

    All
    What I'm Learning
    What I'm Noticing
    What I'm Up To
    What's Inspiring Me
    What's My Impact

    Archives

    May 2025
    April 2025
    March 2025
    February 2025
    January 2025
    December 2024
    November 2024
    October 2024
    September 2024
    August 2024
    July 2024
    June 2024
    May 2024
    April 2024
    March 2024
    February 2024
    January 2024
    December 2023
    November 2023
    October 2023
    September 2023
    March 2023
    February 2022
    June 2021
    January 2021
    October 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020

      Stay Connected

    Subscribe to Newsletter
Explore your possibilities.
Book now
2124 Dupont Ave. S. Suite 102, Minneapolis, MN | 612-804-7665 | [email protected] |The nature photos were taken in Kauai, Olympic National Park, Asheville, Switzerland, and Austria | ©2022 by TransformAble
  • About
    • Client Testimonials
  • Services
    • Coaching
    • Consulting
    • Facilitation & Speaking >
      • Layers of Leadership
  • Blog
  • Connect
    • Positive Intelligence
  • Events
    • THRIVE Retreat