Living into Grounded Grace

"To hear
another’s voice,
follow
your own voice,
wait until
that voice
becomes an
intimate
private ear
that can
really listen
to another." 
​Excerpt from Start Close In ― David Whyte

We are a month into 2025, beyond the typical time for Happy New Year greetings. So now it’s time for stepping into what’s next – visioning has been dreamt, planning has been done, goals for the year have been set, at least that’s all supposed to have happened according to the “experts” – it’s time to bring it to life. And I’m all in on that in so many ways. I get excited about the what’s next, I love the possibilities of it. What I don’t love as much is the uncertainty of it. With possibility comes the fear and uncertainty of what may or may not be. This is where I can get myself stuck if I’m not careful. That shows up in different ways, sometimes I over-plan (I hardly ever over-vision, I love possibility and yet I go down the rabbit hole of how rather than staying with the beautiful, exciting picture of what.). Other times I avoid the unknown and stick with what I do know, the habits I’ve built over a lifetime. It’s the same thing really, staying in a place of stuck rather than breathing and moving forward to the place of possibility.

​My year started with a magical long weekend at Wild Rice Retreat in Bayfield, WI. I co-led a women’s retreat for connection and restoration with my friend and amazing yoga instructor + financial advisor, Ahndi Fridell – we called it PAUSE! It was a time for staying still on purpose, not avoiding, instead being with ourselves, each other, and nature for three days all in. What I learned from this experience is that we need this time, whether we know it or not, devoted time for connecting with what really matters. Time to slow down, take a breath, and see what unfolds. I was grateful to witness the power of creating a connected community in precious moments with the 11 women who joined us. The gift of space and time there led to transformation.

This experience has been a great reminder of the importance of taking time for myself. Truly choosing to be with me. It’s not a choice I make as often as I’d like. Instead I spend a lot of time rushing from thing to thing, fitting in one more task, getting lost in my thoughts of “what if” and “what now”  and “how.” When I do this, I disconnect from what really matters to me, what I value. I also get disconnected from those around me. Sometimes it can take a full minute or more to register that my husband has just said something. Responding at that point, even if I can replay what he said, is almost laughable. 
 
And the answer is simple, but not easy. It’s about taking a beat and taking a breath. Connecting to what’s important. Adding some space and bringing attention to that, whatever that is in the moment. Right now it’s writing this blog. Tomorrow it will be something else. And that’s the work for me, following the thread, what’s important now? How about now? It reminds me of the Verizon commercials – “can you hear me now?” Let’s listen for ourselves in the midst of the busy. When we find our voice that’s where we find our life. It also reminds me of Mary Oliver’s poem The Journey which ends with:
 
“But little by little,
as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice
which you slowly
recognized as your own,
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world,
determined to do
the only thing you could do--
determined to save
the only life you could save.”
 
That voice, my voice, is saying the phrase grounded grace. It’s my phrase of the year along with my commitment to coming home to myself and offering grace and love. My word started out as grace, which is like a cool drink of water on a hot day or simply a deep breath. It feels just right for this year a follow-on to last year’s word of ease. Ease is about acceptance and that’s not an easy nut for me to crack. I like to fix things, not accept them. Fixing is the way I try to control, that’s how I try to handle the uncertainty and fear. Accepting is the letting go – not something that comes naturally for me. So that’s where grace comes in. Grace is about forgiveness. Offering grace allows me to let go. It’s about perfectly imperfect – phew, that’s what I want.
 
And during morning yoga as I thought of my word, I noticed a yearning for the space of grace (it’s a rhyme 😉) along with some structure too. The first words that came to mind were strong or strength, they didn’t quite fit. And then as I stood in tree pose it came to me, it’s grounded grace – that’s my phrase for the year. Grace with all its allowing and spaciousness and grounded with its clarity and foundational strength. Grounded grace comes from a deeper knowing, it’s about guiding and forgiving when I make a wrong turn. It’s about listening to my voice. It’s a both/and, if you’ve been reading my blog, you know I love my both/ands! 😊
 
So with grounded grace, my living into 2025 is not about casting far and wide for the next exciting thing, it’s not about finishing the to-do list for the next achievement, it’s not even about fixing the problems of the world for the next safe moment (although I really want to do that), it’s about coming home to myself for what really matters. Coming home starts right here, in this place in the blog image, where I have quiet time with just me in the morning. Offering myself grace and love in the moment so that I can hear my own voice and I'm available to offer it others from my grounded center. And from that place following my path, the path that unfolds one step at a time. Looking for your path forward? Let’s connect.